"Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life. Psalm 23:6
Ok, my flesh is acting up again... need some prayers friends... the medication I am taking is really affecting me, physically and emotionally... first the medication is timed, so I have to follow the rules, not miss a dose and do it at the time they told me to... well, every time I take it wakes me up... actually makes me do things that I will usually will not be so picky about... like...if I see a spot on the wall I Will scrub that spot 'till clean and shiny... kind a OCD stuff... when I take it at night 8pm... thoughts start to happen, I start to worry, I start to think, what's coming next, etc... I am so glad Bethany is staying with me these days, that way I focus my attention to her and love, and she draws me out from all those ugly feelings of concern ... but, when time to sleep comes... uff... can't sleep, I have my eyes close, but the wheels in my mind keep spinning, and the worse part is that I am so afraid about falling asleep... I know my mind is playing ugly games with me, and the doctor has told me unfortunately is a side effect of the medicine... but, I have no choice.
So, I pray and Pray, but although I know God is next to me, loving on my, my flesh is weak, and I am afraid of falling asleep....
The doctor has given me some medication to help me sleep, but, because my next dose of that medication (that is affecting me ) is a 2 am... then, is when I take the medication to help me sleep, that way, when I take the medication at 2am, in 10 minutes I am cooking (cause it also makes me hungry), cleaning the house, putting things away, etc... so, I take the medication to help me sleep along with the other medication that keeps me awake at the same time.... and then in works, after I eat something around 215 am, then I go to sleep....and sleep well.
But, I need your prayers, cause I need more sleep, I need to not be afraid of going to sleep, and I need to go to sleep at least around 10pm, to have a healthy sleeping pattern, enough hours and have the energy to take Bethany to school in the mornings and do all the things I have to do....
Please keep me in your prayers on this matter, I know is very personal, but you all are my friends, so I don't mind sharing.
personal note: I found this little encouragement card I will like to share with you... "When we fully understand the wonder of God's love, we will want to share it with everyone we know. We can't keep it inside. As we tell others, we will praise Him because He sacrificed His Son to make us right with Him and then, He gave us full access to Him."
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Sofia...come and stay with me. You cannot sleep and my house needs cleaning. LOL! Just kidding. Not kidding on the staying with me. Tape pictures over all the spots of beautiful colorings Bethany has painted and bible verses that cheer you up. Buy a warm blanket and watch movies to help. Nothing will happen when you sleep...only thoughts. Get a jack russell puppy....they will drive you crazy and you cannot think of nothing else...don't do that trust me. Turn on some music. I pray that Satan takes those thoughts out of your head in the name of Jesus and that God gives you the restful sleep by carrying you like footsteps in the sand when you need. With love always,
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