John 3:16-17

For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life. For God did not send his Son into the world to condemn the world, but to save the world through him.

Sunday, December 5, 2010

Dec 6 Shands from sofia



"Indescribable, uncontainable, You place the starts in the sky and named them, you are an amazing God" Yes, it is me, very quick while I have some energy, it is 12 here, but you know hospitals they wake u up for your hep shot in the belly that really hurts, take vitals, etc.
Mama has done an amazing job at keeping you guys updated with this blog (thank you mami) God has put her as my mom when He knew I needed her, His grace is amazing.
Thank you for all your words of encouragement, means a lot to be loved and prayers.
Many of you say I am inspiration for you, but honestly I feel like this little kid crying out to God every day. I have passed through the furnace (big surgery) and He was with me. All the doctors are amaze at how well I am doing after a surgery like this, they thought I will lose control on my right arm and other things, praise our Jesus I can move both hands, both feet, see, talk and hear, His grace is amazing. I am covered by the armor of God, He will never forget me or forsake me, what a present!
At this point if God grants me life I think I know what he wants me to do...something I learn in this hospital... I been fighting so bad to get my license in hygiene and then in RN, thinking is money and ministry...but money really means nothing... when I see the PCAs here coming with a smile, with a servant heart (most of the PCAs are christians) they sing praises to God when they come, do the service job, sponge baths, caterers, vitals, change your bedding, etc... one of them said to me, this is not the best paid job, but is not bad either, Jesus came to serve, not to be served. When the nurses come of course is with the knowledge, they know what meds to give you, when and when u need them, they are very nice too, but the real service is below them. If I do well in all these and God wants me for much longer I believe has become clear that service is what I should do, spread the gospel through what I am going through and give the word of hope and serve with a happy heart.
As I txt before, one morning this cleaning guy came to pick the trash, he was singing to the Lord, said good morning and smile...I said to him, please keep smiling like that and singing to the rooms you go, you have a way to bright the day for the sick...he said, I dont do much, I only pick trash, but I am happy I can leave a little seed of love everywhere I go in this hospital...man...no matter what you do always praise God, ppl watch every step and attitude we have.
Prayers I need....many! last night was terrible, nothing will take my headache away, they dopped me and even gave me morphine and did not work, puked many times (sorry for the details) and not till 5 this afternoon I started to feel better. Dr. says CT Scan shows brain fluids are doing well, that is gonna b an up and down for about 2 weeks now, puking, headaches, etc, part of the deal...the doc said...Sofia 60% of your cerebellum has been removed cause the good cells became malignant, so we had to remove as much as we could... part of the back bone was taken out and not put back, we drill on your brain to put the draining tube... u r gonna b in a lot of pain for about 2 weeks, is part of it...days free of headaches, days with really bad headaches...they are not gonna do the final test which is the spinal tap (take a small portion of the spinal fluid to check there are not malignant cells). I did not want chemo or radio, but the pediatrician that was added to the board (because this type of malignant medulla blastoma is seen only in children) said that they have failed every time when surgery is only done, 100% of the times come back, so I do need the radiation and chemo to have my 5050 chance. As our pastor Luke said, life is a gift from God, I have so much to teach Bethany about the Lord and life, and I think the Lord has plans for this little life still, so I am gonna fight, not gonna be fun or easy, but with the Lord we can do it all.
Radiation starts on Thursday the 9th and is gonna be for 5 weeks, they said they have to do a full head radiation and spine, so be it, God is in control, I am afraid, but crying to God every moment and He comes and comforts me. Then I am gonna have a break and do chemo, dont know for how long yet, hope this little body can take it.
Our sister Sue Hea has been kind enough to come tomorrow to help me, God always lift someone up for us when in need. Here I am gonna attach a pic that my sister took while here, one of those "good days" that I eat, and no headaches. but please is a big difference...this pic is all "al natural" no make up, no hair, just as I am, the real me! Lol
Prayers I need is that the Lord keeps me cool and not afraid, that my trust in Him grows and grows every day, that I should not be afraid about radio or chemo.....huge prayer...all this med dont let me pee! (again sorry for the details) but there are so many things we take for granted, even peee is a gift that we can do it on our own! please pray I relax enough so I can do it myself.
Thank you mama for the CD player and Julia for the parlants, I can listen to my christian music and my CD bible with it, excellent present!

4 comments:

  1. Sofia,

    My mom, Linda C, told me about your story. I have been following your blog and praying for you. I just wanted to tell you about a little friend of mine who has leukemia. She is only 5 years old and just finished 986 days of chemo. You can do it Sofia!! God Bless, Tamara

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  2. Oh Sofia. You look beautiful to my eyes. May the Lord relieve you of all fear. May your body work properly, may the Radiation & Chemo do a "good work" in you, and may you live to dance and tell of the Lord's goodness in your life.
    Much love,
    patti

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  3. u are gorgeous because you radiate His beauty!

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  4. Sofia,

    You are in my prayers every day. You are still beautiful to me. I am amazed at your spirit and strength. Keep up the fight. As you know, I'm a cancer survivor. The medical technology gets better every day. I know you will make it through. I love you very much.

    Pops

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