"Remember that I commanded you to be strong and brave. So don't be afraid. The Lord your God will be with you everywhere you go." Joshua 1:9
I don't like talking just about me, but I know you all want to know how did it go with the last chemo. I did not take my last chemo since the results of my MRI showed the cancerous tumor is back, same spot. My Oncologist here had a conference call with my oncologist in Shands, and both determined that I have not many options at this point:
1)Go to Memphis to St. Jude Hospital for an experimental treatment (although St. Jude is a hospital for kids, they will take my case since it is a children cancer)
2)Have brain surgery again, but keeping in mind that is the last resort once grown, and the last time they can do brain surgery in me since that area of my brain has been operated already and part has been removed. I only have the chance for one more surgery, that's it.
3)Don't do anything, just wait and see what happens.
So, here you see me between:
1)Going for an experimental drug that has not been approved by the FDA yet and has been tested only in animals. It may work and kill the cancer or may not work and make me miserable during treatment and during whatever time of life I have left, far from Bethany, and my church family, my independence and area I know.
2)Taking the chance and be optimistic, not taking the unknown treatment, and live whatever time of life left in a happy, joyful time. Spending good times with my Bethany, teaching her to follow God and His paths (in the best way I can), enjoy time with my brothers and sisters in Christ(that the Lord has bless me with)...
Can you see the picture? a scale with 2 arms... one holding the unknown, the other one holding the known
What have I decide to do?
This is a difficult decision to make, so I have prayed to the King of Kings to take the decision for me, and to tell me out loud (sometimes I can be really deaf!) what He wants me to do. I want guidance on this one, so I know my Lord, my King will show me and confirm the way I should go.
God has the days of my life counted as well as the number of hairs in my head, I have faith He has a wonderful purpose with a good out coming in all the things that He permits to happen in our lives.
I have peace in my heart, and know this peace comes from my Jesus; I have the strength to keep going, because of Him. I have the assurance that Bethany will be fine if the Lord calls me home, she is God's princess, I know He will guide her and love her. He will never leave her, not forsake her. I know my mom, sisters, brothers and friends will miss me, but their faith and understanding of eternal life promised to us through Jesus will keep them up, looking forward to the day that we will see each other again.
I have assurance that if I go home, I will be dancing on my Father's field, that I will see my earthly dad again, and best of all I will be hanging around with Jesus, and I will finally understand many things.
The idea of going home does not make me sad, because I know with all my heart that everyone I will leave behind will be taking care by my father Jesus; there will be no tears, no worries, no fights at my Father's house. But, if my God grants me more years of life, then I will be singing songs of joy, worshiping God and telling my story, anything that may bring glory to God.
The pictures I am attaching are from a butterfly called Rosie. Bethany found this wounded butterfly on the ground, couldn't fly no more cause her wings were broken; nevertheless, Bethany picked it up and brought it home. We cut a grape for her and place flowers. She did stick her pick in and out of the grape to eat (that alone was a beautiful view), then she started trying to fly while standing on our hands, hair, fingers, etc. She finally died few days later; but, she left us with good memories. She shared with us her beauty, and during her short life brought a smile to our face and shown us the wonders of God's creation.
ps: I will be participating in a prayer-walk fund raiser that will benefit the medical mission of In Deed and Truth Ministry (Tonj, Africa). If is in your heart to help them, sponsor me writing a check to them: In Deed and Truth Ministry . All donations are tax deductible.
You can mail your gift to Indeed to:
P.O. Box 273
Lynn Haven, FL 32444
Please check their website for more information and to find out all the wonderful things they are doing for the people of Tonj, Africa.
Their website: www.indeedandtruth.org
Love you all!
ps: Don't pay attention to the date on the pic... I had not have the chance to change the date on my camera (lol)
1)Go to Memphis to St. Jude Hospital for an experimental treatment (although St. Jude is a hospital for kids, they will take my case since it is a children cancer)
2)Have brain surgery again, but keeping in mind that is the last resort once grown, and the last time they can do brain surgery in me since that area of my brain has been operated already and part has been removed. I only have the chance for one more surgery, that's it.
3)Don't do anything, just wait and see what happens.
So, here you see me between:
1)Going for an experimental drug that has not been approved by the FDA yet and has been tested only in animals. It may work and kill the cancer or may not work and make me miserable during treatment and during whatever time of life I have left, far from Bethany, and my church family, my independence and area I know.
2)Taking the chance and be optimistic, not taking the unknown treatment, and live whatever time of life left in a happy, joyful time. Spending good times with my Bethany, teaching her to follow God and His paths (in the best way I can), enjoy time with my brothers and sisters in Christ(that the Lord has bless me with)...
Can you see the picture? a scale with 2 arms... one holding the unknown, the other one holding the known
What have I decide to do?
This is a difficult decision to make, so I have prayed to the King of Kings to take the decision for me, and to tell me out loud (sometimes I can be really deaf!) what He wants me to do. I want guidance on this one, so I know my Lord, my King will show me and confirm the way I should go.
God has the days of my life counted as well as the number of hairs in my head, I have faith He has a wonderful purpose with a good out coming in all the things that He permits to happen in our lives.
I have peace in my heart, and know this peace comes from my Jesus; I have the strength to keep going, because of Him. I have the assurance that Bethany will be fine if the Lord calls me home, she is God's princess, I know He will guide her and love her. He will never leave her, not forsake her. I know my mom, sisters, brothers and friends will miss me, but their faith and understanding of eternal life promised to us through Jesus will keep them up, looking forward to the day that we will see each other again.
I have assurance that if I go home, I will be dancing on my Father's field, that I will see my earthly dad again, and best of all I will be hanging around with Jesus, and I will finally understand many things.
The idea of going home does not make me sad, because I know with all my heart that everyone I will leave behind will be taking care by my father Jesus; there will be no tears, no worries, no fights at my Father's house. But, if my God grants me more years of life, then I will be singing songs of joy, worshiping God and telling my story, anything that may bring glory to God.
The pictures I am attaching are from a butterfly called Rosie. Bethany found this wounded butterfly on the ground, couldn't fly no more cause her wings were broken; nevertheless, Bethany picked it up and brought it home. We cut a grape for her and place flowers. She did stick her pick in and out of the grape to eat (that alone was a beautiful view), then she started trying to fly while standing on our hands, hair, fingers, etc. She finally died few days later; but, she left us with good memories. She shared with us her beauty, and during her short life brought a smile to our face and shown us the wonders of God's creation.
ps: I will be participating in a prayer-walk fund raiser that will benefit the medical mission of In Deed and Truth Ministry (Tonj, Africa). If is in your heart to help them, sponsor me writing a check to them: In Deed and Truth Ministry . All donations are tax deductible.
You can mail your gift to Indeed to:
P.O. Box 273
Lynn Haven, FL 32444
Please check their website for more information and to find out all the wonderful things they are doing for the people of Tonj, Africa.
Their website: www.indeedandtruth.org
Love you all!
ps: Don't pay attention to the date on the pic... I had not have the chance to change the date on my camera (lol)
